I’m sorry I haven’t posted for a couple of weeks. I’ve been struggling with mad anxiety.  Since my accident I have developed a real fear for hospitals so at the beginning of this year when I was told I would need to have a small operation… well you can only imagine my reaction. Serves me right for being a mare in JR I suppose! I was a bad girl and kept pulling my tubes out .. in my defence I was out of it on meds, completely unaware and convinced I was being tortured. (Of course I am eternally grateful for the emergency services and the nurses/assistants who helped me). One of those tubes was my catheter. Yes, I pulled my catheter out, ouch! This resulted in me damaging my bladder. Finally, on 19.11.18 I had the procedure to (hopefully) fix the situation. I was beyond nervous and scared. I couldn’t sit still. I was pacing around the hospital room, laughing to tears like a crazy person! Thankfully (normally it’s only under 16s but I’m a baby!) they let my lovely mum down into theatre to hold my hand when they put me out. The last thing I remember is saying that my head felt funny then crying that I don’t like feeling drunk, haha. Then I woke up worrying I was going to wet myself, demanding a cheese sandwich!

TMI coming up…

Now I ain’t gonna lie, I knew and was worried that going to the toilet would be super painful. I kept turning to the nurse questioning her for reassurance. ‘No’ she said, ‘it will just sting a bit.’ Bloody liar! I almost hit the roof. The PAIN!!!!!!

So that’s where I’m at at the moment. Not a fun time but another step down recovery road. Moral of the story: DON’T PULL YOUR CATHETER OUT!

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