Dear diary…

For the last few weeks my anxiety and stress levels have been so high and I’m just over it! AH! Just trying to ride this wave, knowing it will end✨🌈

It’s okay not to be okay. Some days are just harder than others.

I’m so tired of feeling like I can’t control my own thoughts, yay for mental health. I feel like I’m constantly fighting with myself. It’s beyond frustrating because more than half the time, I think if this was a friend confiding in me (a question I am often asked in therapy) I would definitely not be speaking to them like this. Why are we so hard on ourselves???

I feel like a failure. I feel like I have failed therapy. Even though I have learnt a bloody lot from it, I haven’t got the true benefit because I won’t/can’t allow myself to “sit with it”. It hurts too much. I think every session, give or take a few, I’ve shouted at my poor therapist (bless her) DON’T TELL ME TO SIT WITH IT! and refused. We have a plan for me though. Oh my, it’s really, really tough and I knew it would be. Slowly but surely.. I won’t give up.

What would I say to a friend? It’s okay to say that you’re not okay. Allow yourself to feel. Your feelings and emotions are valid. Struggle does not equal failure and you cannot fail if you don’t give up💚

 

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